Illustrated in Depression-era chain gang woodcut style
Carl's Honest Opinion
The Story of a Man Who Hated Everything
Carl did not like people. He did not like animals. He did not like the world. He did not like himself. He was sent to reform school at age eleven, where the adults beat him until he hated everything that moved. 'You taught me how to be mean,' Carl wrote later. 'So don't complain about the results.'
Panzram was sent to the Minnesota State Training School at 11, where he was subjected to severe physical abuse that he later cited as formative.
Carl traveled the world committing crimes. He robbed a former president's house and used the money to buy a yacht. He sailed to Africa. He did terrible things in Africa. He did terrible things everywhere. Carl was an equal-opportunity terrible person. No continent was safe.
Panzram burglarized William Howard Taft's home, using the stolen money to buy a yacht. He committed crimes across the U.S., Europe, and Africa.
Carl was the most honest criminal who ever lived. He didn't make excuses. He didn't blame demons or voices or dogs. 'I hate the whole human race,' he said plainly. 'And I have no desire to reform.' When people tried to be kind to him, he told them to stop. He meant it.
Panzram was remarkably self-aware and refused to claim insanity or remorse. He confessed to 21 murders and over 1,000 assaults.
In prison, a guard named Henry Lesser showed Carl kindness. He gave Carl paper and a pencil. Carl wrote his autobiography. It was the angriest, most honest book no one has ever read. 'I wish the whole world had one neck and I had my hands on it,' Carl wrote. Henry kept the manuscript. He thought the world should know.
Guard Henry Lesser befriended Panzram and provided writing materials. Panzram's autobiography, published posthumously, is considered a significant criminal document.
Carl was sentenced to hang. 'Hurry it up, you Hoosier bastard,' he told the executioner. 'I could kill ten men while you're fooling around.' They were his last words. Carl was exactly who he said he was, from the first page to the last. The world is full of liars. Carl, for all his faults, was not one of them.
Panzram was executed at Leavenworth in 1930. His final words to the hangman are among the most quoted in criminal history.